A Matter of Husbands (Earnest Young Woman)
Earnest Young Woman says
No. I’ll read it to you.
(She opens it and reads mournfully)
“My darling, Shan’t be able to call for you at the theater tonight. Urgent business. A thousand apologies. Ten thousand kisses. Alfred.” I found it on his desk this morning. He probably intended to send it to the theater messenger. But he forgot it. And I opened it.
(She weeps.)
Why mustn’t I? You steal my husband and I mustn’t cry! Oh, I know how little it means to you. And how easy it is for you. One night you dress like a royal princess, and the next night you undress like a Greek goddess. You blacken your eyebrows and redden your lips and wax your lashes and paint your face. You have cosmetics and bright lights to make you seem beautiful. An author’s lines to make you seem witty and wise. No wonder a poor, simple-minded lawyer falls in love with you. What chance have I against you in my cheap little frock, my own lips and eyebrows, my own unstudied ways? I don’t know how to strut and pose and lure a man. I haven’t got Mr. Shakespeare to write beautiful speeches for me. In reality you may be more stupid than I am, but I admit that when it comes to alluring men I am no match for you.